Saturday, 7 September 2013

Why I do medicine?

Initially, it never crossed my mind to do medicine. When you are in high school there's always someone that you might know who always got excellent result and don't know what to do in his life so he opted to do med. That was me. Somehow, reputation doesn't speak for your interest and it does make my study a little rough and rocky.

My parents always have high expectation on their first son (me!) and for them medicine is one of the jobs that is the most secure and highly noble considering how world has advancing so far. For them, I need to be a good role model for younger siblings and that simply said, I HAVE to do medicine so they will follow my footsteps. 

I enjoy studying; I love learning new stuffs and I always find they are intriguing. Still, that doesn't stand up for what I want in life. Medicine is rich with human theoretical knowledge and with the ongoing research and studies it does make medicine a dynamic and a tough field to be involved in. Still again, it doesn't keep my spark on fire and I keep on being hopeless on studying.

You know you enjoy what you do in life, whenever you wake up every morning you have this rush of motivation to start your day with enthusiasm and optimism. That will drive you the entire day to do your best and that what makes you love your job! 

This is me, on the contrary:

A: Oh, have to wake up early today? Ward round at 8am. Naahhhh sleep in is better. SNOOZE!

A: Ahhh, give me 20 more minutes. I hate life.

A: Oh shoot. 8am already and I'm still in bed. Ahhhhh I hate life.

This cycle repeats every single day. Maybe that's how people see me as a laidback person, since I'm lacking this driven pursuit to study. Somehow, I'm thankful that I still pass the years through out medical school.

I know my such little effort would never last me in my study and a sudden turning point event had turned my life upside down. Simply said, I was heartbroken, devastated and I was thinking of getting my arse out of this life-consuming blackhole.

Then, I realised I actually have NO other talents or skills apart from case presentations, suturing techniques, drawing out human anatomy, explaining how surgical procedures is done and the most important thing how I communicate with sick people (or clients as some people might say). I'm not sure where these came from but it's definitely from the MED SCHOOL! 

It was never going to be the same like before but I'm always thankful to Him the Al-Mighty for giving me a "slap" in my face to be extra hardworking and giving an optimism another chance. At the end of the day, you think you may be born to do medicine but without the right attitude and effort, your hope might sink like Titanic ship.